fafa dont preach

ayyyyyyyyyy! sisters akoy naloloka. can somebody give me her expert opinion? bawal ang boys, i dont trust them. they thrust me. shing!

lam nyo kc ba nmn, ako'y isang dalagang pilipinang makatao, makabayan, matatakutin sa diyos. eclavu lang yun first 2, akshuli makalalakeng magpapabayad ang hanap ko. pero trulalu ang aking fear of papa Jesus. so pala-church going ako every Sunday (the rest are sindays hihihihi)

anychoo, para magkaron ng flavah, i even started to go to different churches. para bang personal panata na sa sarili ko (personal nga e boba!). pansin ko lng ha, as in pansin na pansin, iba iba ang version ng "Ama Namin"! May tonong parang panghelehele sa anakis, may tonong parang gregorian chant, may tonong pangmetropop, may tonong pang pabasa.


maygosh abelgosh! baka dumating ang time na ang mga kapamilya pop stars na walang magawang matinong kanta e simulan na rin patulan ito't gawan ng sariling "remake". noooooo way puhleeaassseee. hayaan na natin si jaime rivera nlng noh.

sabi dati ng religion teacher ko (na im sure virgin pa rin hanggang ngayon hahaha loser!), catholic means universal. e hello, explain nyo nga sa akin ang pangyayaring itech? sagot, dali!

chorva.

They are everywhere!

Hay naku mga sisters, I had an almost-wonderful evening kagabi kaso imbyerna ang beauty ko. Anyway, can I make kwento what happened last night? As if may choice ka, LOL.

So last night I went to that sosyal na mall with a very gwapo friend na crush ko talaga. Pero di nya alam ha? I swear! We were with another friend, so we make ikot and look at the store displays. Chaka yung iba, kasi sumabay sila sa fugly Christmas theme ng mall. Hello, under-the-sea Christmas? So chaka.

We passed by this sosi restaurant kaso wala silang sariling place, kasi nakapwesto lang sila sa corridor. Ok lang, masarap naman daw ang food. Saka masarap din yung isang waiter ha ha ha!

Grabe sisters, may-I-drop ang panty ko dun sa cute na waiter (pero mas gwapo pa rin yung kasama ko no). As in chinito, may dimples, like nya magsmile, saka ewan ko, as if his eyelids have lives of their own.

We continued walking until such time na dinner na. So without second thoughts, inaya ko sila dun sa sosi resto. Aba, love ako ng Heaven, kasi yung cute na waiter ang lumapit sa amin! Ang lekat, nag beautiful eyes! Ay, grabe sisters, muntik ko na masabing "Can I take you home?" Buti na lang my proper decorum kicked in. Naupo na kami then he came back with menus and waited for our orders. While my friends were looking at the menu, I was looking surreptiously at the cute waiter ha ha. And in fairness, nakatingin sya sa akin ah. Oh, di ba, winner ang beauty ng sister nyo.

He took our orders, and he made sure na sya rin ang nagserve sa amin ng food. Pero nawindang ang beauty ko ha. Akalain mo ba naman na unahing iserve yung order ng crush ko. At ang tingin at ngiti nya, OMG! Hindi sya sa akin nakatingin, kung di dun sa crush ko. Pero syempre, I was so rational, sabi ng brain ko, "Loka, natural lang, kasi food nya yun so natural sa kanya nakatingin si waiter." Oo nga naman.

Pero, mga sisters, some part of me was bothered, parang spider sense ni Peter Parker. What I did was that I observed him carefully. After serving our food, he went on to other customers, but he kept on glancing at our table. When I saw him do that, he smiled. Ay, kakakilig sisters.

When my crush went to the toilet, my world crashed. Aba, ang cute waiter, sinundan ng tingin ang crush ko! Bakla ang cute waiter!

Chorva na ito!

kadiring toilet tale

Dear readers, if you are eating, or about to eat, please stop reading. This post is probably the grossiest ever by the ever beautiful and fabulous Beach Blondes. You have been warned.

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Hay naku mga sisters, we all know na the toilets are the most kadiri place anywhere. So kadiri, in fact, that we have invented an euphemism for toilet. I still wonder if we can really find comfort in the comfort room, no? Ako I cannot, specially pag kadiri gumamit ng toilet ang mga people.

I remember a former officemate making reklamo about supposed-to-be-professionals' yucky toilet habits. Ako naman, being a Beach Blonde, di ako naniwala, coz from where I came from, we know the proper toilet habits, ah. Saka we are in the 21st century na, so dapat marunong na tayo. Di ba?

Ay naku sister, imbyerna ako kanina. So I just got in, I went immediately to the toilet when I was blasted by a smell. Grabe, ang stinky, kadiri! As in I cannot describe the smell, sister, kasi kanina ko lang naamoy yung ganung klase. I almost puked! I was shocked, girl's toilet tapos ganun ang smell! My gahd, balahurang girlies! Understandable kung men's toilet yun eh, karamihan naman sa mga boys eh with poor toilet habits, given na yun. Pero, haller! Girls, prim and proper, pero ang yucky nyo ha!

May-I-complain ang lola nyo sa ibang girls, at it's just the tip of the iceberg daw. Kasi there is this jologs na girl who doesn't know how to use the flush. As in gumamit pa sila ng powers of deduction and they used the process of elimination para lang madetermine kung sinong balahura itech. Aside from not flushing, di raw nila magets kung paano magweewee ang balahura girlalu, kasi every time daw gumamit ng toilet ang girlalu, basa ang toilet seat! Yuck! Saka nagkalat raw ang used tissue paper anywhere. Hay, sa kwento pa lang, I wanna puke. May worst pa dyan, kaso over na kung i-share ko pa. Basta yun, yung may yellow submarine pa sa toilet bowl, yuck, kadiri talaga!

No wonder. Galing daw sa school that likes the color blue ang hitad.

So I told the story to a male officemate, and may-I-share ang lolo about men's toilet. Ganun din daw sa toilet nila, he used a term nga na I'm not so familiar with eh. Mapanghi ang ginamit nyang term, I'm not sure what it means pero the way it sounds eh yucky na sya. May sinabi pa sya, para raw naipon na urine sa isang arinola, which I think is the local term for a piss bowl. Yeeww. How quaint.

Hay naku, let's end it here mga sisters, baka di na ko makakain ng dinner. Chorva na pag ganun.