Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Chuck Norris hates popped collars, foo!

Hello my dear readers! Beach Blonde here reporting for duty ehehe. Anyway, girlfriends, vent lang ako sandali ha. I'm just so imbiyerna 'cause ala pa dun sa paycheck ko yung Christmas bonus! How am I supposed to buy gifts for my inaanaks? Tsaka I'm planning to buy this Dior saddle bag pa na matagal ko nang pinagiipunan! Hmp hmp hmp.


Anyway, I read somewhere that Chuck Norris once crashed into this frat party and then proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight! Then he drank three kegs of beer and **** on their floor, just because he's effin Chuck Norris.

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So yun, first were the tilted trucker caps, then came the half-tucked shirts and the pleated mini skirts and now naman this senseless fashion abomination! They're practically found in all preppy training centers sa kalakhang Maynila, like the malls in Makati and syempre, ang mga walang kamatayang coffee places na parang mga kabuteng shawarma stands kung magsulputan. Why are these guys popping their collars, most especially if the color of their shirt is pink, baby blue, or any other color that's just too gay, even for me??!

Whatever that shirt is, LeTigre, Penguin, Hollister, Ralph, Lacoste, Bench, Penshoppe, AzzKickr, BNY, Rough Rider, Lee, whatever chorva chuvaness...If you pop your collar you're stupid. Stupid ka. Idiot. Moron. At lalo na if you're like, short and on the chunky side! Please god, diyos ko naman. Idol mo ba si Count Dracula? Or James Dean? Or Elvis? Or are your ancestors from England where the weather is kinda drafty? Or may secret golf course na ba ngayon sa malls na may 24 hour sunlight na makaka sunburn sa indio batok mo?

I mean, what's your point? Or walang kang point? Or you just want to appear any of the following?:

a. unique
b. sophisticated
c. stylish
d. rebellious
e. tae

Boyfriend, kung a, b, c, or d ang choice mo you're definitely an "e". a very big "E"! Walang none of the above para sayo noh. "E" ka lang. Period no erase!

I hope Chuck Norris drops by the place you hang out, pulls your shirt over your head and backfists your face!

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

oh my gawd. i have a dior saddle bag!


*love yah!